Our adoption blog has gone international!

Wow, our adoption blog has gone international. According to Blogspot, our adoption blog has been seen in the U.S. (the most, obviously), Iran, India, Canada, United Kingdom, and Indonesia. That's crazy! I can't imagine how it has had the far of reach other than to really appreciate the viral nature of the internet (and the niceness of friends and strangers). I have a Facebook friend from Canada who posted our site on her FB wall, so I am guessing that is how those from Canada came about it. Not sure about the others. But, just goes to show you that this method can really raise awareness about our desire to adopt.

Why is this important? Because like Kevin Bacon's 6 Degrees of Separation, everyone knows someone who eventually knows someone who has had an unplanned pregnancy and may want to consider adoption. Just today a friend of mine was telling me about how a friend of hers is in an adoption situation based on knowing a friend who knew a friend who eventually knew the mom of a pregnant 16 year old who wants to place for adoption. A lot of times that is how open adoption happens.

Yes, many of us hire these big agencies to help us find women interested in exploring open adoption, but we know of many open adoptions that happened through a network of friends (and sometimes that network extended far).

We don't know if our networking through this blog will do us any good. We don't know if anyone considering adoption has actually even seen our blog and letter, but at least we know if you are reading this you may remember us if you run across someone who has had an unplanned pregnancy.

Last night I read an article about adoption marketing that had a lot of good ideas, especially if you are going it alone without an agency. I don't think we are ready to go that far because we do have this fancy-pants agency we've hired that is helping us to find a birthmother. But, there are a lot of easy things we can do that might increase our exposure. It's better than sitting around feeling helpless about the adoption process.

In our own adoption story of Maggie, many people are surprised to learn that after working with an agency for 18 months, we actually ended up finding our own birthmother, and she is perfect in so many ways. So, I say this to say you never know how it will happen.

Today, we got to hold precious little baby Adam who was recently adopted through open adoption. He is so cuddly and cute--I really didn't want to give him back, but alas the moms said we had to. Maggie said when we got home how much she wished she had her brother or sister already living here, and I tried my best to remind her that God has a plan for our family, and hopefully we will find out soon enough. It is so sweet to see how nurturing she is with babies and toddlers, everyone else for that matter!

If you would like to help in our journey, please post this to your Facebook wall and ask people to take a look at it.

Maggie flying her first kite!

As far as milestones go, Maggie learned how to fly a kite today. Even with very little wind, she was able to get it up in the sky. She was so proud of herself. And I am so happy she was able to do that today. We can't take for granted the good life we have and how much the simple pleasures can be the best experiences.

Feeling grateful~
Kathy

Yes, people, we are still adopting

I am amazed how many people have asked me if we are still going to adopt after what happened to us with our February failed adoption. Of course we are! We have made that abundantly clear, yet even as the words come out of my mouth people will say to me "yeah, but with what happened and all, I didn't think you would do it again."

I know I should cut people slack who aren't familiar with the joys and heartache that can go along with open adoption, but I can't always be so perfect as to not get pissed once in a while.

For those not familiar with open adoption, failed adoptions can be a part of the process, and hopefully anyone doing an open adoption is aware of that challenge and can handle it emotionally. We know many people who say they can't handle the possibility of a failed adoption, or even the roller coaster ride that sometimes happens with open adoption.

That is not us. We went into this fully aware of how open adoption works and the risks involved. Hell yes, we were emotionally devastated when our adoption fell apart, but we NEVER, EVER had any thoughts of quitting. We know in our hearts that the right baby and birthparents will find us. I am sorry if you can't understand that or can't bare to watch us go through it because it might not come in a neatly wrapped package.

Open adoption is a journey that leads to beautiful results. Certainly you can see that if you know our daughter Maggie. We are the luckiest people alive to be picked by her birthmother to raise her. Not a day goes by that we don't think about how grateful we are for the little miracle we have been entrusted.

I am so sorry for those who do not understand the beauty of open adoption. We fully appreciate it and know we will find the baby that was meant for us through it.

If you happen to read this post, please don't ask me if we are quitting. We wouldn't be who we are if we quit. We are so tougher than that, and our love for our daughter and future baby wouldn't allow it.

Peace~
Kathy

Busy days can be a good distraction

Today, just whizzed right by and I am not sure how much or what I accomplished. Lisa has been home sick with a fever, so I have tried to keep her quarantined in bed. She is a terrible patient and keeps getting back up to help around the house. It is tough for one person to keep this house going with 3 dogs, 1 cat, and a 6 year old.

Maggie reports she had a good day at school (this is the same for everyday :-)). Her teacher said she was able to count to 1000 today. Math is really starting to click with her (I hope reading comes soon, too). She was not happy with me when I told her we were not staying on the play ground in the rain and cold after school. She didn't see anything wrong with playing in the cold rain. She forgot all about it after I took her to buy some new dresses at TJ Maxx (they have the best deals on nice dresses for little girls). I couldn't help but laugh when she and I fought about how we could not buy every dress in her size. My mother so would have loved to have this kid since I wanted nothing to do with dresses as a kid.

After our dress shopping, we headed over to Maggie's karate class. Her Sensei was so glad to see her and commented on how strong Maggie is becoming. In the middle of class, he came over to me in front of the other moms and asked where we were for February since we missed the entire month. I had told him before we left that we were going to possibly adopt a child, but I guess he has too many kids to keep up.  Nonetheless, I couldn't bring myself to blurt out in front of everyone that we had been in Louisiana trying to adopt a baby and that it didn't work out. I guess I will e-mail him tonight and let him know what happened because I am guessing he will eventually remember or Maggie will give it up in the middle of class one day.

After karate we headed home so Maggie could get ready for bed, and I could head over to the kid's consignment sale to see if there is anything I needed to get for our future baby or possibly Maggie. If you have never been to a consignment sale, it is quite the experience of elbowing other moms and a few dads so you can get the best deals first. All the best deals are gone in the first 30 minutes of this 3 day sale.

I can't believe how much stuff I bought. I bought Maggie a ton of summer dresses and skorts (she no longer wants to wear shorts).
I got a Baby Trend Snap-n-Go stroller to put our car seat in.  I never had one with Maggie, but apparently they are great to get around in. I also bought a few baby toys fully knowing that I had better stop doing so because the kid hasn't even been born yet and the room is filling up with toys! Our nursery currently looks like a storage room for Babies r Us. Maybe this weekend we will get it all organized again. We have pretty much stayed out of it since we have been back from Louisiana. At least it doesn't bother me as much to look at it.

Our adoption caseworker e-mailed me twice today (that's a big day for us since she is usually so busy). Once to say they finally changed our pictures on their adoption website, and another time to tell me how many birthmothers saw our adoption profile. Sometimes they even tell you if you were picked as a second or third choice by a birthmother, which always makes us feel a little better. No such luck this month. We were only back in the books for 2 weeks in February, and our profile was shown to 4 birthmothers, which is about what we have averaged in the past (8 per month).

We are planning to step up our adoption marketing efforts over the coming weeks. I am excited that we are meeting with a professional photographer this weekend so we can get some nice photos. Even if we don't end up using them for the adoption, I am excited to have them for our family. Though our house is filled with wall-to-wall photographs, we actually haven't had many done professionally.

I am all worked up about what Lisa and I are going to wear since we won't be able to change once we get to our location. It will be casual, but I want to have the right color combination, etc. I am constantly looking at the weather forecast trying to at least know whether we need to be thinking about Spring or Winter clothes since the temperature is going back and forth. I probably should be more worried about whether Lisa is going to be well enough for the shoot at this point.

I guess I better get to folding the laundry before bed since I promised Lisa I would have it done and she could go back to bed. Last night I was up super late, and then had to take a nap after I took Maggie to school this morning. A therapist friend of ours told us that sleeping was probably one of the best things we could do to heal from our failed adoption, so I have been taking a few morning naps to follow her advice. I guess sooner or later, I need to give that up, but a first start in that direction will be going to bed at a reasonable hour :-)