Saturday, April 16, 2011

Dear Adoption Agency

Ready to Adopt!

Dear Adoption Agency,

I see on your website you have another adoptive parent information session coming up. If you wouldn't mind, please do not sign up anymore new adoptive families until after we have adopted.

Thanks so much!


If only it worked that way! I am not a math genius, but I am fairly certain all the great families with our agency would adopt sooner if they wouldn't add any new families for a while. Each month they average 11-12 adoptions. This is why we signed on with them. It seemed like they did a fairly good number of adoptions in a given year with a reasonable number of prospective adoptive parents.

If you look at some adoption agencies, they have an extremely high number of clients at any given moment, and most do the same number of placements as our agency. We thought since we had done our research, paid our on-the-high-side adoption fees, that somehow our adoption process would be easier. In fairness, I guess it would have had our first match worked out in a successful adoption.

This week in our adoption world, we actually had a little activity. Nothing that has led to us adopting a baby, but still, in the open adoption process, we know having some activity is definitely better than no activity because you never know when it is going to happen.

We had our first call from a birthmother due to our own networking efforts. She was young, and only 4 months pregnant, so she likely has a ways to go before she chooses an adoptive family. She seemed very nice, and was very nervous about talking since she had never done this before. She is lucky in that her mom is helping her through this process.  I have to assume it would be helpful to have a supportive mom help you sort through families and to figure our the right questions to ask. I don't know if we will ever hear back from her, but it was nice to know she was considering us an adoptive family for her baby.

Today, I heard from a good friend of mine who is an adoptive parent of four. She was telling me about a baby born at the local children's hospital that is being placed for adoption. Apparently the baby was born with some health complications, but is now fine. When she heard about the baby she immediately thought about us and our desire to adopt. I think the baby may already be linked with a local adoption agency that probably has its own list of waiting parents, but she was going to try to get me some more information to see if we could be a possibility. It is a long shot, but definitely great that our friend came across this situation and called us. That is how this adoption networking is supposed to happen!

Maggie, our first adopted angel

We don't know how "our journey to another angel" will unfold. We have learned from our past experience that you just never know what the day may bring you. The last time we adopted, we had been waiting 18 months before we had our successful adoption. We had literally gone to see the movie "Million Dollar Baby," and came home after crying about that story (it's about a woman boxer who is such a fighter in her own life). For some reason, this brought out feelings in both of us about the adoption process even though it had nothing to do with adoption. Lisa and I both looked at each other that evening and said it is okay if the adoption-thing doesn't work out for us. It was as if we released it out into the universe and the phone rang at our house within the hour with Maggie's birthmother and her two moms. Within 3 hours of us telling the universe it was okay if we didn't adopt, we knew in our hearts that suddenly we were going to become parents within a very short period of time! Weeks later, we were holding our amazing daughter, and she was named after the main character in "Million Dollar Baby" because we were so moved by that moment, and the character in the movie was someone any parent would be proud to have as a daughter.

Long story to say I am always amazed by what can unexpectedly unfold in any given day, both good and bad.

In other news, we are very excited that Lisa received a job offer this week from a new employer. She has been wanting to work in a new industry for a long time, especially since the radio industry is a dying business. Finally, somebody is going to give her a chance to learn a new industry. The reality is that anyone would be lucky to have her as an employee because she is a workhorse and can easily learn a new industry. So, we are excited that this new job opportunity has presented itself, and in many ways looks like it will be a better opportunity for our family. The new job even offers adoption benefits, which means the company is supportive of its employees adopting, and helps them pay for a small portion of the adoption. It will be nice to work for a pro-adoption company again like the one Lisa was working for when we adopted Maggie. Every little bit helps!

I am all scrunched in bed between Maggie and my cat, with a dog at my feet. It reminds me of the book Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (one of my favorites) and how all of his grandparents slept in one bed. Not that we don't have other beds, but because there was a thunderstorm here tonight, everyone is huddled in our bed, and somehow I always getting the bad end of the deal with the least amount of room. And I am probably the most claustrophobic, but this is my lot in life :-)

Signing off for tonight! Good night, everyone!


1 comment:

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